Jack in The Box for President!! (Artificial)

Please note: What follows is not my opinion about blogging, bloggers, or blog land. The opinions expressed here are soley those held by the characters of the story. The characters are actually artificial and fictional. My personal feelings are, on the whole, at the opposite extreme.

 

Once upon a time in the Land Of Blog, lived a Jack in the Box named 'Jack'.

Now Jack, by his nature, had a few problems.

Not only did he have both Short Man's Syndrome and No Legs Syndrome, he also suffered from that peculiar and rare disease called Nothing at All below the Hips Syndrome.

Consequently Jack on springing up out of his box first thing in the morning always felt slightly inadequate.

So one Saturday night, while under the influence of nicotiana tabacum , he decided to do something about it.

He decided he was going to be President of All of The Land of Blog.

This fact he confided to his wind-up friend Union Jack the next morning. At the time Union was painting his face with Woad and getting ready not to go to church.  He was named Union Jack because he had two glass eyes imprinted with the English Flag.

"But why?" asked Union Jack. "There's nothing here in The Land of Blog, just a lot of bloggers. It's all, umm, artificial."

Jack in the Box looked down into his friends red and white eyes. "Well why not?" .
"What good would it do you?" asked Union Jack.

"I'd feel,... I'd feel good."

"But it would be an 'artificial' feel good."

"Let me ask you a question then," said Jack in the Box.

Union Jack stuck out his chest. "Fire away."

"What do you want to do when you grow up?"
"Hmmph," said  Union Jack. He pointed at the spring in Jack's box. "It's all about you not having anything, you know, down there."

"Oh, it is not!" said Jack in the Box and crossed his arms.

But his friend Union Jack knew differently.